"Deal"ing with reality

Just a lil slice of life from a casino dealer's perspective.

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Location: Edgerton, Missouri, United States

I grew up in a small town, and live in small town now. Like to think I have more than a small town mind, but I doubt it.

Sunday, September 03, 2006


There are many sources for a lack of intelligence. One of the worst is just plain arrogance. Arrogance that one knows it all and doesn't need to listen to anyone else. Arrogance that you won't make a mistake, and if you do it's really a mistake someone else made.

That kind of arrogance is acceptable (barely tolerable) from one person. However when that arrogance breeds and spreads to an entire family it becomes something that no jury would convict a person for removing from the gene pool.

For this post I will call the family I refer to the Royal Family. So named because they are a royal pain. In the back, in the neck, in the....Wherever else you get royal pains.

The Royal Family has a tendency to strut into the casino at the worst of times. They enter shortly before closing time (yes, some casinos do close) and want to play a game that has already been shut down. Even when they decide to lower themselves to actually playing an open game, they want the rules altered to their advantage.

It's really bad when Mama Royal is playing a game while Daddy Royal stands behind her telling her what to do and BigSis and MiddleSis Royal chatter away like a couple swarms of cicadas buzzing on a warm spring afternoon.

It gets worse when a bet hits that wasn't there in the first place. Then the entire clan flocks in to start henpecking the poor dealer to pay Mama Royal for a bet she had either never placed or had lost earlier and didn't deign to replace.

The absolute worst was one night I was dealing to Mama Royal and all three Sisters on a blackjack-style game. As part of the casino's nightly closing (and again, yes, some casinos do close) procedures an announcement is broadcast over the PA system that it is time for the last 3 hands of blackjack to be dealt.

Upon hearing the announcement I informed the entire table that there were 3 hands left in the night. After a (surprisingly) quiet 3 hands I told the entire table (the Royals being the only ones there) that the game was over for the night.

"Can't you deal just one more hand?"
"Just one more hand, you have plenty of cards left."
"There's lots of time left till closing, you can deal one more hand."

Apparently they didn't think a lowly dealer citing state gaming regulations had enough clout to stop them from gambling. They started calling my floor supervisor over and nagging him to make me deal one more hand.

The lady Royals spent so much time sending their daggerish voices flying at my supervisor and me that they didn't have time to cash in their chips before the casino closed and had to come back the next day to get their money. Adding the cost of fuel to the meager losses they had already endured.


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